Phil better be right...

Glen Johnson has officially put pen to paper. Phil Neil thinks that the corn-rowed one will help us finally get the best out of Fernando Torres. If this means he’s going to keep our boy wonder happy and hamstring injury free, I’m all for it. Rafa is a happy camper and thinks we can sign one more player without selling anyone at all. Even though he said we needed changes, he now says he’s happy with our squad and there is no need to change it. Translation: we have no more money for transfers. Read the rest…

Now that I've offended 940 million people...

Speaking of shady dealings, even with our limited transfer budget we’ve gone out and signed ourselves a Hindu Deity. As pictured, Vishnu will be playing right back for the red half of Merseyside next year. Ok, it might actually not be Vishnu but one of his many avatars. Errrrr…..fine, it’s just Glen Johnson. Where our cash strapped little club found £17.5m to sign this boy I’ll probably never know. Apparently Pompey still owes us £7m for some infrastructure we sold them (Peter Crouch) so I guess that drops the price down a little. Is this going to be a bargain or did we just pay WAAAAAAAY over the odds for a player the Chavs shipped off so Roman could have a little walkin’ around money? Read the rest…

The sign should read NO SQUATTERS.

The hangover happens the next day.

-Dr. Joyce Brothers

It’s very rare that I write about the ownership. To be honest, I’ve only mentioned our “benefactors” in passing over the last year writing for this blog. I don’t like the subject because I don’t like them. I don’t like thinking about our club being flushed down the economic toilet. But am I going to write this post? I suppose I will since our debts are coming due. If you’re even remotely connected to the club (or are one of our rivals who relishes our current woes) you know the future is uncertain. Hell, times are tough all over. Most of you may not understand this economic crisis but I can guarantee all of you have been affected by it in one way or another.

A year ago banks were handing out money to hobo’s on the street but now even the mega rich can’t get a break. Very few saw it coming and it’s hitting home in a big way. You may have lost your job. You may not be able to get a loan. You may have mounting credit card debt that keeps you awake at night. Jumping out the window or in front of the morning bus may not look that bad these days. But enough of my problems, how does this all relate to those 11 men we watch kick a ball around every week? Read the rest…

Player of the Season? Believe 'dat!

Last year I bitched and moaned about everything. We did well but not well enough. We didn’t have the players, the resources, the strikeforce or the tactical nouance to win. The siren song of the scouser. Next year is our year. Isn’t that always the case?

We started off the year by trying the sell our eventual player of the season and by signing a geriatric Irishman who forgot how to score goals. Fuckin’ hell, could you imagine if Rafa got his way and we had Barry in place of Xabi? We would have been lucky to hit the top four. Rafa finally realized we needed a bit of width and brought in Albert Riera to try to plug up that Risse shaped hole that was left when we sold his OG scoring ass to the Romans. David Ngog came in up front and showed a bit of promise while our defensive purchases of Degen and Dossena spent more time doing Harry “Sick Note” Kewell impressions or being mediocre then putting in an effort. Read the rest…

Gracias Miguel

It’s that time again.  The season is over.  All that’s left is a few insignificant cups here and there and some international crap in the summer.  The transfer window will be opening soon.  Then, we can speculate on when our speculations will be realized and if they’re not, then we will continue to speculate during fall and into winter.

Looking back on this season in the EPL, who were the winners and losers?  Obviously, Manchester United with be touted as the winners since they’re at the top of the table.  Interestingly enough, Liverpool have less losses than them and a better goal difference.  Also, two out of the four of Manchester United’s losses came from Liverpool.  Such a funny world we live in.

Last season there was a scare when Liverpool almost didn’t finish fourth.  This season, they were truly title contenders.  After equaling their performance last season in the Champions League and solidifying their staff, I’d say that this club has definitely improved and should be looked at closely this summer.  If Rafa Benitez can afford to sign the right players, look out next season.

Read the rest…

....and I'm telling you it's about the mutablity of human life!

With nothing left to play for, I have a sad admission to make. I fell asleep during the first half. West Brom isn’t worth 4 points. Man U has wrapped up yet another title and we’re left rueing yet another season without any silverware.  Rafa has no interest in congratulating Ferguson which might be a little tacky to some but I have to say it’s understandable. He’s a big boy and can make his own decisions. All we have left is a visit from Tottenham for our last home game of the season. A chance for Reina to claim his third set of Golden Gloves. Robbie Keane is returning to Anfield on the other end of the field and we’re going to have to give him a little cheer.

Second place isn’t all that bad, is it? At least we’re not going down…..

-steven.

It's raining, it's pouring...

The Baggies sit dead bottom and we’re 6 points behind the leaders. They’re looking to pull off the great escape and we’re looking to pip Man U to the title. They’ve seen the ball hit the back of the net about a 1/8^th of the time we have and we’re looking to keep our multi-goal game streak alive. A lot of contradictions in this one isn’t there? I’ll stop now.

There’s no time like the present. Regardless of whether we can, for lack of a better expression, rob Man U, this season has been quite the roller coaster. All they need is a draw and we’ll have to hear garbage phrases like “three-peat” and “best team in ages”. They might have already won it by the time it kicks off on Sunday. Horrible thought but forget the glory hunters for a minute. There has been rumblings about us not doing enough but when was the last time we finished runner ups? When was the last time we put in a challenge like this? This is a squad that has the chops to do the business and we’re showing our worth. Rafa has put together a team that’s going to be pushing the top far into the future. It’s only a matter of time.

Enough with the day dreaming, focus on the Baggies and pray the Gooners can do a job for us. They’re going to be looking to wrap up their Champions League spot and looking for a little revenge against the Mancs for denying them a date with Barcelona. I wonder how many plane tickets from North London are going to go unused? We’re all Gooners tomorrow. As John Kreese would say, mercy is for the weak.

In other news, join the boycott. Fuck Cohen (no, not Leonard).

-steven.

It wasn't a worth the Gold, sorry....

You have to give Zola and his Happy Hammers credit though. They didn’t give up even when they were two-nil down and the match seemed a forgone conclusion. There was still some spark in the West Ham game and they didn’t want to send their fans home disappointed. In retrospect they did leave disappointed but as Mom would say “it’s the thought that counts”. Read the rest…

I'm back FUUUUCCCKKERS!

Zola has done wonders for the Hammers and he’s going to be looking to push on. After some early doubts, it looks like he’s done everything but wrapped up a place in Europe for them and it’s going to be crooked smiles all around tomorrow win, lose or draw for the West Ham faithful. The last goal the Italian scored for Chelsea denied Liverpool a European place and a win tomorrow would make the title race all but redundant.

Saturday has come too early for Xabi Alonso but we’ve got a little boost with the Monster Mach back in action and hat trick hero Fernando Torres making the short trip to London. Even I’m getting tired of hearing me say “this is a must win game” but it’s the honest to God truth. Man U aren’t going to let up but their minds might be on a certain fixture coming up in Rome against a rampaging Barcelona side. If if’s and but were candy and nuts I wouldn’t need so many pharmaceuticals now would I? I think I cacked that one up. I’ve never been too good at proverbs anyways.

In other news, Sami Hyypia is going to be moving on in the transfer season. The big Finn has agreed to a deal with Bundesliga side Bayern Leverkusen. Could anyone actually have a bad thing to say about Sami? He was our captain at one point, played a key role in our Treble Winning season and no could dispute his role in our Champions League win of 2005. A fantastic servant to the club and a model professional all around. Good luck in all you do. YNWA.

-steven.